“You can search throughout the entire universe for someone who is more deserving of your love and affection than you are yourself, and that person is not to be found anywhere. You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection.”
Gautama Buddha
How To Love Yourself Again When You Do Not Know How: Do you often consider yourself a worthless and incompetent person? Are you struggling to accept yourself? Have you forgotten how to love yourself? If the answer to all these questions is a Yes, this article is just for you. Loving oneself is the first and most important task which one has to do without making excuses.
To love yourself does not mean being selfish or arrogant. Loving yourself means recognizing your own self-worth and living your own life as honestly as you can. Loving yourself is one of the best gifts that you can give to yourself, and you deserve the highest level of self-love.
Truthfully, loving yourself unconditionally is within your grasp. You can learn how to accept yourself and achieve inner peace simply by changing and incorporating some healthy habits into your life.
Loving yourself requires you to be honest about your current choices and thought patterns and undertake new practices that reflect self-worth. Sometimes living up to your full potential is just about taking the time for self-care.
Master The Art of Loving Yourself To Change Life
To love yourself is to experience happiness and security on a whole new level. Learn to love yourself to get all the happiness in the world. Remember, you were born with a right to be happy. Self-love is respecting and practicing that right for your happiness and well-being.
Love of self leads to the love of others. When you love yourself more, things simply become lighter and easier. Self-love involves recognizing that you are constantly evolving into a more powerful and more loving being.
Honestly speaking, To love and accept yourself is easier said than done. But it is not an impossible feat and with a little practice and patience, you can learn to love yourself, too. Remember, loving yourself is something that will take time and effort.
However, if you are willing to commit, here are 20 powerful tips to help you authentically love yourself. We hope these tips will help you to lead a successful and happy life without the fear of being left out or without seeking others’ validation.
How To Love Yourself When You Do Not Know How To Do It
Believe You Are The Most Important Person In The World
“Self-confidence is the most attractive quality a person can have. How can anyone see how awesome you are if you can’t see it yourself?”
Anonymous
What should be the first step towards the journey of loving yourself? Of course, A strong belief in your own existence. A belief that has the potential to uplift your spirit when you are scuffling with the feeling of self-rejection. Yes, first believe with your all heart that You Are The Most Important Person In This World. That you are second to none.
Believe in your greatness. Create the highest, grandest vision possible for your life, because you become what you believe. You can emulate someone who is great, but you are not that someone. You can’t please everyone acting like someone else but can do so by being yourself.
Stand firm to who you are. You don’t have to be others; you just have to be you. Always stand up for what you believe in. Always question what other people tell you. At the moment, You cannot know your place in history yet your moment will come. Have faith.
Accept Yourself But Never Forget To Improve
“Everyone seems to have a clear idea of how other people should lead their lives, but none about his or her own.”
Paulo Coelho
Always be yourself. Never try to hide who you are. The only shame is to have shame. Accept yourself for who you are and in whatever situation you’re in. Learn to appreciate yourself and catch yourself doing good. Cast out of the idea that you have to be perfect because Nobody is perfect in this world except who created this universe.
You only need to improve yourself, to get rid of your flaws. You can’t be perfect, and holding yourself to unrealistic standards creates suffering. Many perfectionists have unrelenting inner critics who are full of so much rage and self-hate that it tears them apart inside.
Fight back against that negative voice, amplify your intuition, and start challenging your unrealistic standards. Befriend yourself unconditionally. The beliefs of others are not your concern-acceptance is.
Each one of us is unique in our own way, and that is what makes this world so fantastic. What is right for me may be wrong for you-all we can do is let go of judgment and accept one another for who we are.
Find Your Very Purpose On The Earth
“We are all here for a purpose. Meditate on your life purpose, and then use your gifts and talents to live your life on purpose.”
Anonymous
Find your place and your purpose. Know why you are on this Earth? There is no other better way to love yourself than to find and dedicate yourself to a noble and worthy goal. This is perhaps one of the hardest steps to love yourself, and many people take their whole life to find their purpose.
A lot of people never fully realize it during their lifetime, but it is absolutely essential to living life to the fullest. Think about a talent that you were born with, something that you enjoy doing and that you feel would benefit the world by doing.
The main way to determine if you aren’t in the right place is by looking at the amount of satisfaction you feel in your life. If you feel satisfied with your work and your surroundings on a daily basis, then that is a good sign.
Step Out of Your Comfort Zone
“A ship is safe in harbor, but that‘s not what ships are for.”
William G. T. Shedd
Some people never get out of their comfort zone and explore the unknown because they are afraid of it. However, you’ll never know what your future holds unless you try new things and welcome different experiences. Get out of your comfort zone and try something new. Be curious and keep learning.
Ask more questions and keep pushing yourself to step outside of your comfort zone and learn. Whether you feel like you’ve gotten stuck in a boring routine or you’re stressed by the tasks of daily life, learning something new is a way to step outside yourself and your comfort zone.
Changing your life takes doing things you’ve never tried, working outside of your comfort zone, and challenging yourself. It may feel like it’s too hard, but I believe that learning how to love yourself is possible for anyone.
Try To Devote Some Time Daily To Know Yourself
“A man, as a general rule, owes very little to what he is born with – a man is what he makes of himself.”
Alexander Graham Bell
Do you know what is the biggest reason behind our grief? Ignorance! Yes, our ignorance about our own self. Most of us know that we all are souls but in reality, we do not consider ourselves Immortal Soul. We think like an object and act in the same manner. We have forgotten that our own self is divine.
We assume the body as “I and mine” and that’s the reason why we are forced to suffer misery after misery in our life. Always remember, You are more than your body and mind. Our own self is divinely Eternal Existence, and it has no Ego.
If you want to love yourself, first you have to know your real self. Because if you don’t know yourself, it would be hard to control yourself and if you don’t have mastery over yourself, it’s very hard to like yourself. Easier said than done, right? But it’s not impossible.
After all, if you don’t know who you are, how can you expect someone else to know who you are? So try to devote some time to know your real identity on a daily basis. How can you accomplish this feat? we will describe it in the next article.
Develop A Routine And Follow It Unremittingly
“You create your own world. Find a routine that feels good and stick to it.”
Pawan Pratap Singh
Making yourself start is difficult but when you follow a routine with proper understanding and resolve everything becomes easy. Make a personal self-care routine and follow it strictly without an excuse. Routine thrives on the power of self-discipline. Self-discipline will provide you with the mental reserves required to persevere when life throws you one of its little curves.
Create a routine that will help empower your life rather than hinder it. Wake up early, eat a good breakfast, work out for 20 minutes, do yoga or meditate, write out a set of daily goals, and so on. Don’t live life in neutral. Do what it takes to feel good in multiple ways. Take control, grab the reins, and be inspired.
Keep yourself motivated to do and achieve something while helping others and yourself in the process. All actions and activities in your routine should be directed to the goal of becoming better and healthier both mentally and physically in order to live your best life and feel confident while doing it.
Don’t Worry About What You Can’t Control
“The good life is one inspired by love and guided by knowledge.”
Bertrand Russell
If you want to be at peace with yourself, let go of what you can’t control. We spend our lives worrying about things outside our control, feeling powerless to experience an extraordinary life. Many of your problems seldom come to pass. It is the uncertainty of an unexpected future that causes pain and disillusionment.
Let go of worry and develop trust because life is self-serving and knows exactly what it’s doing for your greater good. Life is not fair. It never was, it is not and it will never be fair. You can’t control a lot of things but you can control how you respond. We can do our best and still fail and it’s not our fault.
As human beings, we have a tendency to be hard on ourselves. But when you let go of perfectionism you can accept that you did your best, whatever the outcome. Hope for the best and expect great things-and if that doesn’t happen, let it go.
Forgive Yourself As Well As Others
“Forgiveness is not to give the other person peace. Forgiveness is for you. Take that opportunity.”
Mackenzie Phillips
Forgive those who have hurt you because He who is devoid of the power to forgive is devoid of the power to love. Life has taught me that no matter what we do as individuals we can never please everyone. It has also taught me that no matter how nice or humble we might be, there will still be people out there who would not like you for any reason.
And they would try everything in their power to tarnish your image and bring you down. Regardless of what others do to us, we still choose who we are and how to respond. Choosing to be the bigger person and not diminishing yourself in the process can be challenging, but ultimately a more constructive path.
When we carry around hurt and anger, it festers and grows into a spirit of bitterness and offense. When our hearts become bitter and offended we live life wounded and see every interaction through the lens of that pain. Forgiveness doesn’t mean that the betrayal is okay.
It doesn’t mean what the person did to you is okay. Forgiveness is a gift to yourself, not a release of guilt to the offender. It sets you free from the weight of carrying around all that hurt and anger.
Surround Yourself With Positive People And Things
“If a drop of water falls in a Lake, its identity is lost. If it falls on Lotus leaf, it shines like a Pearl. Drop is the same, but the company matters.”
Anonymous
If there is any single most important factor that affects the life of a person unknowingly, it is the company of that person. It is a well-known fact that the life of a human being is shaped in accordance with his company. If you live in good company, your life will move from the ordinary into the realm of the extraordinary.
And if your company is bad you will experience pain and misery every now and then. That’s why it is said that choose your companions carefully. In this world, only 5% of people are good souls, mentally and emotionally sound. The rest 95% of the people do not have a goal in life.
They just crave pleasure by demeaning others, putting hindrances in their path, or by other things. Don’t pay any heed to such toxic and aimless people! They surely can’t achieve anything in life but can stop you or demotivate you to a fair extent. Stay away from them!
Spend time with people who have a great character, and who have a noble purpose in their life. These are the people who are likely to build you up. When we intentionally choose to spend time with those who are supportive, positive, and encouraging, we acquire a positive mindset and are happier.
When we find ourselves surrounded by people who are negative, critical, and hurtful, it steals our happiness and our joy.
Have Indomitable Faith In Your Potential
“The potential of the average person is like a huge ocean unsailed, a new continent unexplored, a world of possibilities waiting to be released and channeled toward some great good.”
Brian Tracy
Realize your full potential. Face your fears and never give up. Many problems people experience arise from a lack of self-love. They focus on their unworthiness instead of choosing to highlight their greater qualities. They create a story of pain and misery which amplifies their suffering. Loving yourself starts by recognizing you are worthy.
You are worthy irrespective of what happened in the past. Try to forget the painful memories of the past. Even the best have to fail to succeed. Remember, Some battles are meant to be fought and conquered alone. A lone person is way too strong, cause he/she has gone through a lot in life.
Give your best effort to everything you do. When you have a task or a project, complete it to the best of your abilities. Even if it’s not something you want to be doing you should still do the best job you can. Giving less than 100% won’t make you feel better or bring any positive rewards.
Learn To Be Patient With Yourself
“He is happy whose circumstances suit his temper, but he is more excellent who can suit his temper to any circumstances.”
David Hume
When you are having a bad moment, bad day, or bad year, you owe it to yourself to be kind, to be patient, and to be loving. Beating yourself up over mistakes of the past or present doesn’t help you in any way to do better. It’s an act of abuse against yourself, and it will only make you hurt more.
Don’t break apart your own soul. Don’t crush your heart into pieces. Please don’t destroy yourself from the inside out. Be gentle with yourself every single second of every moment of every single day. You are learning. You are growing-you will fumble and stumble but I know you can and will rise again.
You are worthy of your own attention, care, and forgiveness. If you have been treating yourself badly today I really hope that you’ll take this opportunity to no longer speak hate into your life but rather love, hope, healing, and joy.
Get Rid of Toxic And Energy Sucking Habits
“Your net worth to the world is usually determined by what remains after your bad habits are subtracted from your good ones.
Benjamin Franklin
If you truly love yourself you must identify your bad habits as soon as possible. Because toxic and energy-sucking habits are the primary reason behind our downfall. Always stay away from bad habits as they will never give you a positive life. However, breaking bad habits and creating good habits takes discipline and strength of character.
If you are determined enough they will soon perish. Celebrate the life you have got and get rid of bad habits like drug addiction, smoking, drinking alcohol, eating junk food, laziness, procrastination at work, and treating people in a bad manner.
To change your bad habits change one habit at a time. Write down what you dislike about yourself, whether it’s your figure, a way of thinking, or a certain behavior, and start working on fixing it.
It might take days, months, or weeks but you will reach it eventually once you set it in your brain. Every morning, before getting off your bed, imagine how your life would be if you change this habit. Feel it as if you become the person you want to become.
Inculcate Good Habits In Your Behavior
“We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.”
Aristotle
No matter what happens to you in your life, you alone have the capacity to choose your response to it. When you inculcate good habits in your behavior, your life moves into its highest dimensions. Practice self-love habits with a clear mind. Give yourself positive auto-suggestions.
Remember, small but simple changes to your everyday habits can make a big difference in how you feel, look, and function. The lasting change in life starts with daily habits. However, You will always feel a little discomfort when you are developing a new habit.
It’s sort of like breaking in a new pair of shoes – at first, it’s a little hard to wear them but soon they fit like a glove. But it is worth noting that small changes in your perspective and habits can lead to life-altering results.
With these tweaks to your life that you can make today, you’ll be on a path towards self-love that most people never step foot on. Please bear in mind that a bad habit once acquired can never be erased.
But they can be replaced with new ones. The only way to permanently install a new habit is to direct as much energy toward it that the old one slips away like an unwelcome house guest. Some good habits are as follows –
- Eat healthy and exercise regularly.
- Write yourself a love letter.
- Never compare to anybody.
- Practice smiling more.
- Follow your passion.
- Compliment yourself.
- Talk to new people.
- Talk to yourself.
- Respect yourself.
- Serve the needy.
- Let go of the past.
Write Down Your Thoughts In A Journal
“Whatever you impress deeply into your subconscious mind will eventually be expressed in your external world.”
Brian Tracy
Journaling is simply writing your thoughts down. According to the University of Rochester Medical Center, writing your thoughts and feelings down on paper not only helps you get your thoughts in order, but it can also help ease symptoms of depression and manage stress and anxiety.
In the chaos of life, it is easy to overthink, feel anxious, or not appreciate what you do have. Journaling can help you manage your thoughts and feelings and you can easily cope with life in a productive manner. Keeping a journal can help you reflect on your past.
It also allows you to see the progress you are making towards your goals and dreams. Plus, spilling your heart out every so often is great for your mind and soul. If you’re looking for a life planner, you can easily find some great life and monthly planners on Calendarpedia and Erincondern.
Identify What Matters Most To You And Do That
“You were born to win, but to be a winner, you must plan to win, prepare to win, and expect to win.”
Zig Ziglar
Walk your own path. Take charge of your life, identify the things that matter most to you, and make a feasible plan to achieve them. Unfortunately, many people love to judge others. It is easy to let peer pressure make you stray from your own path and follow others.
But it is important to march to the beat of your own drummer and avoid the pressure to conform to some popular norm. Remember, You are your own special person and you should follow your own path and reach your own dreams.
Do not let others dictate the way you live your life. Also, Never regret the past because it’s a waste of time. There is a reason for everything – Every mistake, every moment of weakness, every terrible thing that has happened to you.
Grow from it. You can not predict your future based on your present or past. The future can be unexpectedly tough or expectedly smooth. Just focus on what is the need of the hour and channelize your energy into executing the tasks that enhance your life.
When you figure out what your main aim or destiny really is, you will never have to work another day in your life. All your work will be play.
Eat Healthy, Play Healthy, And Live Healthy
“The winners in life treat their body as if it were a magnificent spacecraft that gives them the finest transportation and endurance for their lives.”
Denis Waitley
Take care of your health early. You should never wait until you have health problems to worry about your health. And the best way to keep yourself healthy is by maintaining a proper balance in your daily activities. Remember, your journey of loving yourself first starts with your body.
Loving your body means keeping it healthy and strong. And to keep it healthy you have to eat healthy. Change your eating habits. Eat only nourishing, digestible, and live foods. Junk and dead food deteriorates your overall health.
Apart from consuming healthier food, you should also consider getting some time for recreation because all work and no play make Jack a dull Boy. Remember, A strong body is one that finds movement effortless, and effortless movement leads to a strong body.
To live healthy you have to consider health your most precious asset. If you don’t make your health a priority by 30, you’re setting yourself up for a midlife crisis at 40.
There’s a 50% chance you’ll have a major health setback take you out for 6 months or more by age 45. Don’t increase this chance.
Practice Acts of Generosity And Gratitude
“If we should deal out justice only, in this world, who would escape? No, it is better to be generous, and in the end more profitable, for it gains gratitude for us, and love.”
Mark Twain
If you love yourself, be more generous. Practice generosity. Give your life and resources to others as much and as often as you can. They need your help. Your kids need the example and you need the practice even more than them. Of all life lessons, generosity is the most gratifying.
Generosity has been proven to have wonderful benefits on physical health and well-being. It allows us to see other people in a more positive way and enhances our interconnections with them. Plus, it simply feels good to be generous.
Remember, generosity does not mean donating money or things only. Donating money does less than donating time. Giving your time is a way to change your perception and create a memory for yourself and others that will last forever.
Like generosity, gratitude is also a divine virtue. A lack of gratitude will make everything you do worthless. Regularly practicing gratitude simply makes us better in just about every way imaginable.
In positive psychology research, gratitude is strongly and consistently associated with greater happiness. Be deliberate in being grateful for what you do have, rather than resentful of what you don’t.
Seek Professional Help If You Are Unable To Love Yourself
“There is no real excellence in all this world which can be separated from right living.”
David Starr Jordan
Learning to love yourself is not an impossible job but some people may find it difficult, especially those who are going through a sudden rough phase in their life, like a breakup, divorce, unemployment, etc. These people should find a helpful advisor. Find someone you can trust to confide in and to give you advice.
This may be an old friend or a professional therapist. Sometimes making decisions can be difficult and it will help your ability to make mindful decisions if you have someone to talk to about these issues.
Talking things through with a counselor can lower your stress and anxiety levels as well as give you more confidence in your decisions. A counselor can help you be more self-aware, which will allow you to be more present and mindful in your life.
Travel To The Places Filled With Positive Energy
“Once the travel bug bites there is no known antidote, and I know that I shall be happily infected until the end of my life.”
Michael Palin
Travel is the best education you’ll get. You will learn so much – about a culture, a place, and yourself – when you travel. Travel to places that are abundant with positive and spiritual energy. There are many wonderful places in the world, and I wish I had the chance to explore them all.
Traveling to new places can help improve your confidence, open you up to new experiences, and may even make you a little uncomfortable, which is okay! Plus, doing something different will take you out of your comfort zone so you can live life to the fullest.
Take that break, you deserve it and you need it to re-energize yourself. Traveling is really good medicine to get rid of the things that eat up your head. Leave behind the world you live in and just rest.
Traveling doesn’t have to require spending thousands of dollars on a month-long trip to Europe. It can be as simple as taking a road trip to a nearby city or camping for a weekend.
Whether you feel like you’ve gotten stuck in a boring routine, or if you’re stressed by the tasks of daily life, traveling is a way to step outside yourself and your comfort zone; it is a reminder of how big and diverse the world can be.
Do You Know Why It Is Important To Love Yourself
If you have forgotten why to love yourself, you should always remember these powerful words of the great actor and dictator Charlie Chaplin. In these beautiful lines, he illustrated when you love yourself how your life is moved to higher dimensions.
Remember these lines or take a printout and stick it to your desk as a daily reminder especially if you are struggling to love yourself.
- As I began to love myself I quit stealing my own time, and I stopped designing huge projects for the future. Today, I only do what brings me joy and happiness, things I love to do and that make my heart cheer, and I do them in my own way and in my own rhythm. Today I call it “SIMPLICITY”.
- As I began to love myself I understood how much it can offend somebody if I try to force my desires on this person, even though I knew the time was not right and the person was not ready for it, and even though this person was me. Today I call it “RESPECT”.
- As I began to love myself I found that anguish and emotional suffering are only warning signs that I was living against my own truth. Today, I know, this is “AUTHENTICITY”.
- As I began to love myself I stopped craving for a different life, and I could see that everything that surrounded me was inviting me to grow. Today I call it “MATURITY”.
- As I began to love myself I understood that in any circumstance, I am in the right place at the right time, and everything happens at the exactly right moment. So I could be calm. Today I call it “SELF-CONFIDENCE”.
- As I began to love myself I freed myself of anything that was no good for my health – food, people, things, situations, and everything that drew me down and away from myself. At first, I called this attitude a healthy egoism. Today I know it is “LOVE OF ONESELF”.
- As I began to love myself I quit trying to always be right, and ever since I was wrong less of the time. Today I discovered that is “MODESTY”.
- As I began to love myself I refused to go on living in the past and worrying about the future. Now, I only live for the moment, where everything is happening. Today I live each day, day by day, and I call it “FULFILLMENT”.
- As I began to love myself I recognized that my mind can disturb me and it can make me sick. But as I connected it to my heart, my mind became a valuable ally. Today I call this connection “WISDOM OF THE HEART”.
- We no longer need to fear arguments, confrontations, or any kind of problems with ourselves or others. Even stars collide, and out of their crashing new worlds are born. Today I know “THAT IS LIFE”!”
We hope you enjoyed this article on how to love yourself. You may work hard on your relationships with friends but if you forget about your relationship with yourself, you will definitely miss the supreme level of happiness and contentment in your life.
So learn to practice the art of self-love on a daily basis. Embrace everything and anything that fills your spirit and adds to the good in your life. Creating your dream life will not happen if you are neglecting your intuition and your emotional state.
It is important to check in with yourself. All the things on this list are forms of practicing self-love, but there are even more. Remember, when you fall into the deepest love of self as the enlightened souls, you become a reservoir of vitality, power, virtues, and knowledge.
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